As we drove on the wind blew the clouds West and the first signs of sunshine broke out. Our mood lifted as we passed through streets of nice looking houses, excitied about creating a new home for ourselves, even if it was just for a while.

But the nice houses became less frequent until the driver pulled up outside a building to our left.

"here we are" smiled Isabel..."this is where you will live, but remember, things may get better so please don't....how you say in English? Despair?"

Ok, so it's not what I had in mind but it had some charm. My wife just sat looking at it from the car, seemingly unable to speak.

The driver handed us our one bag and the keys. I opened the gate and it came away in my hand. We opened the front door and stepped over a small parcel in the porch.

My wife took a look around the place and to my surprise was quite complimentry about the place. She had lived in a place like this in France growing up and she began to see the possibilities of making it nicer.

Isabel walked in behind us and said that she would be back in an hour to take me to the ground for my introduction to the press. She looked me up and down again, taking in my creased and stained clothes she said "maybe Senor Mills would prefer to change clothes before that huh?" before making her exit.

"What am I gonna do Luce? I can't face the world's media with this dodgy stain between my legs...looks like I've had some kind of incident"

"give 'em here....I'll try and scrub them for you"

I handed them over and watched her make them a whole lot worse.

As they dried on the window sill we opened the parcel which was from Mark. There was a note inside saying that he hoped we liked the 2 cars he'd negotiated for us. We hadn't even given a thought to the car side of things but as soon as we read that we ran to the window and looked around. Nothing. We wandered a little further down the road and saw what he meant.

Again, not what I had imagined....

As I wandered back to the villa my wife reminded me that I didn't have my shorts on. At the same time an old lady walked passed and started to chase me back into the house with her stick shouting at me....great, now the neighbours think I'm some kind of perv....

I pulled my shorts back on and the stain looked worse than ever. The press are gonna love this I thought.

We opened the rest of the parcel to discover 2 books.

I was just about to dial his number and give him some stick when a car horn sounded outside.

It was Mark not Isabel, ready to take me to El Madrigal Stadium to be introduced to the world as the new Villareal manager.

I got into the passengers seat.

"you wet yourself mate?" he asked....

"just drive...I'll explain on the way".